Friday, November 16, 2012

BOOK RELEASE: DANCIN SHMANCIN WITH THE SCARS



Yippie! Mazeltov! Felicititaciones! Gong Chi! Congratulazioni! Gratulacje.  Congrats in all other languages as well.
Why? The book has been delivered to Amazon and other venues as well. Come see the birth of my newest satirical survival book
The birthing was laborious taking enough time to bring forth an elephant or a blue whale. Regarding that, please, no jokes concerning my own girth. The reason for this optical illusion you think you see has been noted many times by the fact that television makes one look 10 pounds heavier. I have three TV's, so shush. Though, I admit it: in person, if I were a candy bar, I'd be a Chunkette!
This book contains lighthearted humor and some goofiness to help us navigate through our daily hassles including tips and techniques to get to a good place when things are truly tough.
Is your smart phone smarter than you?  Mine too! There is a bitch named Siri living in mine and she claims to be my secretary. She just does not get me. We are currently in couple’s therapy. She is now demanding a clothing allowance and a coffee maker.
Yes, friends, I shot my scale but they were blanks as I explained to the Sheriff. You may resort to violence as well if your scale hid every morning. Related to the subject; I am currently in peace negotiations between my mind and body for a lasting thinness. We are meeting in the kitchen.
Are you tired of people who will not take responsibility? You won't believe this but yesterday a valet brought my car back and the steering wheel was missing and a note that said “Management not responsible for any items left in the car…
Have you been longing to know the secret about where seniors can find romance? It sometimes involves an RX.
Do you know why bald men are sexy? It has to do with. Oops. Unless you show me  your ID, I cannot give that information away in a family type column.
Many answers to these universal questions are found in the book, plus so much more to help you find the humor, no matter your current circumstances.
The book is dedicated to Gabrielle Giffords and Mark Kelly, Wounded (veteran) Warriors and to my dear, courageous friends who have tragically lost children. All of these people and the rest of you, too, continue to dance with life and contribute to the world in so many ways with scars that are not always visible but remain, never the less.. I salute you all.
Hey! Wanna feel good instantly? Remember a time in your life when you were on top of the world filled with unending happiness. Picture that, each detail. What were you wearing? Where were you? What exquisite feelings were you feeling… now recreate that and…..to be continued.
If you are having difficulties at this time, perhaps the book can get you to a more joyful place for a moment while providing a couple of chuckles.  I wish you all the best of everything!
THE END
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